TOWIE boxsets (and no socks)

I have to start this week’s entry with a huge thank you. I have been overwhelmed and humbled by the amount of people who have been visiting the blog lately. It’s due partly to a Grazia article and partly to a Facebook and Twitter campaign initiated by lovely friends and supported by lovely strangers.

When an email pops into my inbox to alert me to a new comment it’s like opening a gift; I have no idea what it’ll say, but the surprise almost always turns out to be a good one; more TOWIE box set than socks! (The former being a very good thing, by the way…)

My years of working in TV news may have hardened me slightly to the world; a relentless procession of horror stories giving the impression that the majority of our planet is made up of murderers, paedophiles and dodgy politicians. Then I find myself in a position where the opportunity for kindness presents itself far more readily and my own personal newsflash makes me realise that there are so many compassionate and considerate people all over the shop – or reading my blog at least.

By the same token I can’t help but be influenced by all of this generosity of spirit. At the risk of being perceived as both sentimental and worthy, a life threatening illness has got me thinking about who I am, how I treat people and what I want to be remembered for.

When you’re surrounded by kindness it’s hard not to give it back. I could write a huge list of all the thoughtful things friends have done for me since cancer came a-knocking; sending me flowers when I’ve been feeling down, bringing food round when I was too ill to cook, cutting my hair short when it was all falling out.

We have an 88-year-old neighbour called George, whose wife of 65 years passed away a year ago. He has no family so at least once a week I’ll go and sit with him for an hour just to have a chat. The other day I saw an elderly lady at the station looking confused as she stared at the tube map. I asked her if she was ok and directed her to the platform she needed; before cancer I’m pretty certain I would have rushed on by, caught up in my own concerns.

Don’t get me wrong; I’m not trying to claim I’ve become Mother Teresa; it has just given me more opportunity to reflect on the way we treat each other. Some people instinctively have this caring gene; one particular friend is the kindest person I have ever met – he volunteers to mentor young people, gets involved with his local community and is just so full of loveliness I wonder how he does it.

Then there’s the kindness of strangers; a beauty editor who stumbled across my blog sent me a bag full of expensive make-up; one of my dad’s friends who I’ve never met sent me a pendant that he would hold while praying for me – now I wear it every day; a church group that my mum’s husband’s parents are part of say prayers for me every week. These are people I have never even spoken to.

And finally there’s the camaraderie of fellow cancer sufferers. The knowing smile that you exchange with the bald woman in the hospital pharmacy who for some reason senses you know exactly what she’s going through. The resounding cheer from a room of five nameless chemo patients when on the fifth attempt the nurse finally inserts the cannula into your hard-to-find vein.

There’s so much goodness out there and sometimes we forget that. I’m just a bit pissed off it took me getting cancer to really realise it!

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82 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Kim Kelly
    Oct 15, 2011 @ 09:09:07

    Another lovely post! I hope you are feeling ok today. It’s hard to know what to say to a stranger…but know that you aren’t alone and you are in people’s thoughts and prayers. x

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 16, 2011 @ 19:26:27

      Hi Kim,
      I’ve just got home after a weekend in Liverpool (Tom is a huge LFC fan) and then we stopped in to see our beautiful nephew and niece on the way back – the nephew is just a few days old. So it was a lovely weekend and I feel very well. It doesn’t seem enough to say thank you for your prayers but I will anyway…so thank you and thanks for reading the blog, Ellie x

      Reply

  2. catriona
    Oct 15, 2011 @ 18:10:57

    What a lovely post – and how it resonates with aspects of my own experience. I have ‘lurked’ here for a while now and found much to appreicate in your posting. So just really, to encourage you to keep posting and to keep being honest and open as you do.

    Cyber hug

    Reply

  3. Melanie Richardson
    Oct 16, 2011 @ 10:23:33

    Hi Ellie

    Thanks for the blog in my inbox today. That felt like a gift, too. I signed up to follow your blog after reading Grazia last week. Me, who’s never followed anything, anywhere, which goes to show how your situation and your writing touched me. You’re right, there is so much goodness out there. But don’t be hard on yourself. Everyone that sees that goodness has almost certainly been visited by the school of hard knocks first. I look forward to your next blog. Take care, darling, you have so much goodwill coming your way, hope you feel it.

    Melanie xxxx

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 16, 2011 @ 19:17:53

      Hi Melanie,
      Thank you for your lovely message. I really can feel all the good wishes coming my way and feel so incredibly lucky to be getting the responses I’ve been getting. Thanks for reading the blog, Ellie xx

      Reply

  4. Becoming herself
    Oct 16, 2011 @ 16:45:16

    This is a lovely post: not sentimental at all, just heartfelt and honest.

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 16, 2011 @ 19:09:38

      Thanks Ashima – I’m glad you didn’t think it was sentimental, I was worried it would come across as a bit preachy! Thanks for continuing to read, Ellie x

      Reply

  5. Rachel
    Oct 16, 2011 @ 19:01:29

    Just beautiful. Reading your blogg always make me take stock and think about the important things in life. Lots of love.xx

    Reply

  6. Hannah
    Oct 16, 2011 @ 20:38:00

    Hi Ellie. The Grazia article was great and you looked amazing in the photos. Your latest blog is so touching and has made me think about what we do for others. Big hugs as always. Hxx

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 16, 2011 @ 21:05:05

      Thanks Hannah – I’m glad you enjoyed the post – was worried it might be seen as a bit preachy but have had some lovely feedback from it. Sending love, Ellie xx

      Reply

  7. Rosie
    Oct 16, 2011 @ 21:10:28

    In Grazia you say you’re not religious, I am, so I will pray for you :). That will work. You are amazing, keep strong and get better. X

    Reply

  8. Sue
    Oct 16, 2011 @ 23:33:39

    Your blog is truly inspiring and so well written. I find myself checking back and back to see if you have written more. I have had bc but so far no secondaries. I hope if I find myself on your path I conduct myself with a fraction as much courage and can resilience. To me you stand for hope. I am willing you on to marriage, a long and happy future and family. If collective wishes and prayers can get you there, then you have them to help you along the (sometimes rocky) road of life. Stay strong Sue x

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 17, 2011 @ 14:27:15

      Hi Sue, thank you for such a lovely message. I hope your recovery from breast cancer continues and every future scan you have is ‘unremarkable’ – that lovely word the doctors use to indicate good news! Thank you for reading the blog and taking the time out to leave such a kind comment, Ellie x

      Reply

  9. Jennieflorist
    Oct 17, 2011 @ 09:17:33

    Hi Ellie, really lovely post, like watching a feel good movie! Hope you are feeling well. Glad you enjoyed Liverpool, (my home city)! X

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 17, 2011 @ 14:23:53

      Hi Jennie,
      I loved Liverpool – especially the chant ‘who’s that scouser in the wig’ at Wayne Rooney and his recent hair transplant! Glad you liked the post and that you’re still checking in, Ellie x

      Reply

      • Jennieflorist
        Oct 19, 2011 @ 13:38:33

        Hahaha….Hilarious, thats scousers for you hey! (me included). Having been really busy with work the last few weeks I hadn’t read all your up to date posts, so since my last comment I saw your post on how your treatment has been working. I am so, so happy for you thats amazing news, my dad had a tremendous battle with cancer nearly 20 years ago, we nearly lost him, you would never believe it if you saw him now he is a brilliant dad/ grandfather, having been a family touched by cancer, your story really touches me, and having seen my dad as ill as he was and how he is now, I truly believe that your cancer should be as scared of you, as you have been if it….if that makes sense? Again I am so happy that you have had some good news and congrats on your engagement, brilliant news. xxx

  10. Toni millard
    Oct 17, 2011 @ 10:16:19

    Love reading your blog gives me such a positive feeling
    I’m also a cancer patient with a terminal prognosis ( sounds like I’m in an airport when I write terminal!!)
    I’m 41 with three children so your advice and blogs help me hugely
    Xx
    Toni

    Reply

  11. Rachel L
    Oct 17, 2011 @ 11:45:16

    Hi Ellie! I don’t know you but I read the piece in Grazia this weekend and I found your blog on google, I’ve just read it from the beginning (shh, don’t tell my boss!) and wanted to leave you a note to say hello. I loved your engagement pics and the brighton one too, very cute and funny. Your fiance is a handsome chap isn’t he? :) I will be following your blog from now on and I look forward to reading your continued progress. Lots of love, Rachel L

    PS I am very glad to read that you have changed hospitals, I did shout a Hurrah (in my head!) when I read that!

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 17, 2011 @ 14:10:06

      Thanks for your message Rachel – the bit about your boss made me smile! Thank you for taking the time to visit the blog too. Tom’s been getting lots of compliments from people who’ve been reading which I’m sure he’ll be glad to hear! Ellie x

      Reply

  12. Peas and Cougars
    Oct 17, 2011 @ 18:56:01

    I always get depressed or disheartened too after I watch or read the news. But honestly, when you just pay attention to what is actually happening around you there’s still a lot of beauty and beautiful people out there. Glad you found a way to surround yourself with positive energy! Wish I could think of a way to give you a better gift than a comment though!

    Reply

  13. charlotte
    Oct 17, 2011 @ 19:17:05

    Ellie,
    You are a beautiful, lovely person, I wish you and Tom all the best for the future. x

    Reply

  14. Ellen
    Oct 17, 2011 @ 19:39:27

    Hi Ellie

    You truely are an amazing and inspirational woman. Your blog has filled me with a whirl of emotions, you write so well that I feel that I can sense how you are and you are feeling.

    You are so talented and your positive attitude should be acknowledged by us all. Tom seems to be a tower of strength for you but it also seems that you are helping him a lot throughout this.

    I HATE what this has done to you, I really do. From this night onwards I will pray for you.

    You’re a lovely person, beautiful inside and out and I’m proud that I know you

    Lots of love
    Ellen x x x

    Reply

  15. anna
    Oct 17, 2011 @ 21:00:33

    Beautiful beautiful lady-wishing you so much love and all other good vibes and I look forward to reading more good news from you. A xxx

    Reply

  16. Philippa Whittingham
    Oct 17, 2011 @ 21:57:18

    Hi Ellie
    Sorry probably bored you rigid on Twitter tonight! I really enjoyed reading your blog as it is not sentimental or “preachy” just honest and very accessible. I understand your concerns about the Mail but people would only have to read your blog to get a sense of you. Could you please email me a postal address as I have a little gift I hope you’ll like. I have never been moved to do anything like this for a stranger before, but surely a stranger is just another human you just happen to have never been introduced to! My Dad fought and beat his cancer over 17 years ago and I know that he appreciated the kindness of friends and strangers alike. Best wishes – Philippa Whittingham

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 18, 2011 @ 09:54:27

      Hi Philippa,
      Thank you for reading the blog. I’m so pleased your Dad fought cancer and won. I really appreciate your advice about the Mail and I think (as long as they promise to put the blog address in) I will definitely go for it. Ellie x

      Reply

  17. Cath
    Oct 18, 2011 @ 08:55:58

    Dear Ellie,
    I’ve just finished reading the article about you in last week’s Grazia and I wanted to tell you good luck! I was really moved by your story, and I now what this fucking disease is…. My mother died 6 years ago, when I was 15. She was only 44 and had to fight cancer twice. We all thought it was over after the first time but nine months after it came back and everything went really quickly. I now she fought for us but at the end she just couldn’t anymore, she was worn out. When you were talking about imagining your boyfriend emptying your wardrobe I was really moved because it is very very hard. Even after 6 years I haven’t had the courage yet to get rid of everything….
    Well, all this just to tell you that I’m really impressed by your fighting spirit, I’ll keep my fingers crossed for you, I’m sure you’ll go through it again and be the most beautiful bride in the world next June! I wish you all the best!
    Cath

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 18, 2011 @ 09:58:05

      Hi Kath – thank you for such a lovely message. I’m so sorry you lost your mum at such a young age. I can’t imagine how hard it must have been and still is for you. Thank you for reading the blog and taking the time out to comment, Ellie x

      Reply

  18. Jane Donovan
    Oct 18, 2011 @ 10:15:07

    Dear Ellie,
    Keep fighting! I found your story in Grazia incredibly moving and I wish you and Tom all the happiness in the world.
    —- Jane

    Reply

  19. Charlotte Johnson
    Oct 18, 2011 @ 13:07:58

    Ellie,

    I have just read your entire blog right from the beginning and it is nothing short of inspirational. I love and admire your positivity and the optimism you continue to show. I whole-heartedly believe this will do you the world of good.

    I recently visited a neo natal unit and there were twins in there who had been born 15 weeks early and weighed less than 1lb each. No one has told them that the statistics are against them – it is their instinct to live, to survive and to fight. You remind me of those babies in that your desire to live is instinctive. Stick with it and you will reap the rewards.

    I look forward to reading your future blogs – I am now a dedicated follower!

    Good luck Ellie and take care,

    Charlotte xxx

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 18, 2011 @ 18:49:15

      Hello Charlotte,
      Nice to hear from you and for reading the blogs – and from start to finish in one go – I’m impressed! Your analogy makes so much sense to me. In Lance Armstrong’s ‘It’s not just about the bike ‘ he talks about how children who get cancer have much better survival rates. They don’t understand statistics or worry about if they have a future or not, they just want to get well to play again. Maybe they get better because they don’t have the life experience to sweat the big stuff? And maybe we can learn from them?
      Thanks for reading and your lovely comment,
      Ellie xx

      Reply

  20. Alan Charnock
    Oct 18, 2011 @ 14:35:51

    So hi Ellie,
    You are so right Cancer does make you reflect on so much, my father passed away at the young age of 67 recently due to Pancreatic Cancer, and even though im not a cancer sufferer myself (fingers crossed things dont change) I have changed so much in how I treat people, like you say im not becoming Mother Teresa, but I now pay more attention and dont want to waste so much of my life being selfish or or not getting involved.
    My heart goes out to you.

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 18, 2011 @ 18:44:32

      Hi Alan,
      I’m sorry you lost your dad at such a young age. I have someone very close to me who lost their dad at a similar age and I know how much it has affected them. Like I said in my post it’s a shame it sometimes takes something like cancer to wake us up to how we are behaving or treating people – but at least we are working on it rather than carrying on without learning any life lessons. Thank you for your comment, Ellie

      Reply

  21. Admin
    Oct 18, 2011 @ 14:55:28

    I lost my Mum to cancer, a brain tumour, two years ago. I’m much kinder now, especially to those I had such little time for before, mainly because I hope people were kind to my Mum when they came into contact with her,making her day nicer, and I also realise now the people I meet mean as much to someone else as my Mum meant (and still means) to me. It is sad that it takes something so heartbreaking to make a difference for the better but my Mum would probably tell me ‘better late than never’.

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 18, 2011 @ 18:40:40

      I’m sorry to hear you lost your mum. It is good to know that instead of being bitter about what must have been a horrible experience you’ve managed to focus your energy in becoming a ‘better’ person. Thank you for reading the blog and taking the time out to comment, Ellie.

      Reply

  22. Helen
    Oct 18, 2011 @ 19:01:29

    Your blog is fantastic, stumbled on it today, an inspiring read that sends a really positive message. I don’t have Cancer and I hope I never do, but I worked as an oncology nurse for many years. You’re absolutely right that being given this diagnosis is devastating enough without having all hope sucked out at the same time. There are many ‘Professor Hope’s out there, I know because I worked with some fantastic people. I am so glad that you found one! I also cared for a great number of wonderful positive and inspiring people who lived for much longer than they were ‘supposed’ to, because a prognosis is only an average number. And you are so clearly not average! My love and prayers to you, xxx

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 18, 2011 @ 21:28:43

      Hi Helen,
      Thank you for your positive message. I think finding Professor Hope was one of the main factors in changing my outlook and deciding on trying to be as positive as possible. I have to say many of the nurses I’ve met on chemo wards and in the breast clinic have been wonderful, caring and compassionate people. Ellie xxx

      Reply

  23. Lauren
    Oct 18, 2011 @ 22:07:03

    Read your story in grazia really moved me my sister has secondary breast cancer shes 37 and has 2 young children , Drs gave her 4 months a year ago the treatment she has recieved is amazing we live week by week she is strong positive and im so proud of her !!
    Reach for the stars Ellie, Keep Fighting Always , I look forward to your wedding photos xxxx

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 18, 2011 @ 22:14:35

      Hi Lauren,
      What a lovely message to read before I head to bed! I love to hear stories of people proving their doctors wrong for all the right reasons. Long may your sister continue to defy the odds. Sending love and positivity to you both, Ellie xxx

      Reply

  24. dawn
    Oct 18, 2011 @ 22:24:43

    Ellie,
    I too have become a follower, having seen your magazine article – and I so don’t normally do this !!!
    I have lived with bc for over 9 years now, luckily with no evidence of disease so far, despite a 50 / 50 5 year survival prediction.
    The fear of recurrence or spread is constant however.
    If I was in your shoes, I truly hope that I could adopt your spirit and resiliance – you really are an inspiration Ellie.
    You have really touched me and I look forward to hearing more good news from you.
    Please know that you and Tom are in my thoughts,
    Dawn

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 19, 2011 @ 08:32:26

      Hi Dawn,
      Thanks for coming along to the blog and taking the time out to comment. It’s great to hear stories like yours. I’m so pleased you have been disease free for nine years, long may that continue. Thank you for your kind message, Ellie x

      Reply

  25. Rebecca
    Oct 18, 2011 @ 22:33:49

    Hi Ellie,
    I read your article today in Grazia and was touched by your story. I am a newly-wed of 6 weeks and I wish you nothing more then a beautiful wedding! My husband is a cancer survivor and I admire the strength that comes in the fight; I read and see that same fight in you! I will check in from time to time to see how you go, but I have faith that God will see you through this battle. You are in my prayers. Sending you lots of love, strength and peace xxx Rebecca

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 19, 2011 @ 08:30:47

      Hi Rebecca,
      Congratulations on your wedding – I hope you had an amazing day. Thank you so much for your positive vibes and prayers, they really do mean a great deal to me, Ellie x

      Reply

  26. Emma
    Oct 18, 2011 @ 23:40:36

    Ellie- I too read both of your articles in Grazia and had to come and visit your blog. It’s so inspiring, honest and wonderfully written. I’m rooting for you and Tom- I’ve every confidence that you can beat this and I’m looking forward to seeing your wedding photos next year. In the meantime, I’ll follow your journey here. Many blessing and positive vibes, Emmaxxxxx

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 19, 2011 @ 08:29:13

      Hello Emma,
      Thanks for such a positive and encouraging message. Thank you for the good vibes, I’ll be taking them with me as I go about my day today. Thank you for reading x

      Reply

  27. Lia Hervey
    Oct 19, 2011 @ 07:36:06

    Dear Ellie,
    I only worked with you briefly at Sky News but thought you were a lovely girl and I felt deeply moved to read about your battle with cancer. I’m so sorry that you’ve had to go through all this.
    I think your blog is great and it’s great to see so much positivity and strength from you.
    Lia

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 19, 2011 @ 08:27:59

      Hi Lia,
      I remember you! Thanks for checking out the blog, I’m glad you enjoyed it. I’ve been overwhelmed by the responses I’ve been getting. The pressures on to keep the writing up to scratch! Ellie x

      Reply

  28. Johnny
    Oct 19, 2011 @ 09:41:16

    Hi Ellie

    Your blog is a-maze-ing! And inspirational too.
    In 2009, I was diagnosed with cancer and like you, decided to share my experiences with the world via a blog (http://johnstoncraig.blogspot.com/2009/05/story-so-far.html)

    I got loads of great feedback from it and it really helped spur me on to get better. Two and a half years on from six chemo sessions, I’m still all clear.
    You will be the same. I’m sure.

    Thanks for sharing your life with us and the only tip I would dare to give you is- keep looking for the funny side of things even when there is none.

    Take care
    Johnny.

    Reply

  29. Clare Balding
    Oct 19, 2011 @ 10:22:32

    Ellie,
    I’ve just come across your blog via a twitter post from Elly Oldroyd, re-tweeting from Lia Hervey (twitter can join the dots in an amazing way). Agree with you about Maggie’s at Hammersmith – amazing place. I was very lucky – short treatment & very curable form of cancer but Jeez I know what you mean about changing the way you empathise with those in pain or in trouble. Loving the blogging & thank you for sharing.
    Best wishes,
    Clare Balding
    x

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 19, 2011 @ 12:40:41

      Wow! Hi Clare,
      Thank you for coming along and checking out the blog and leaving such a lovely message. I’m really pleased your treatment is over and it was a success. Thank you so much for your plug on twitter too. The fantastic response I’ve been getting is overwhelming,
      Best Wishes back your way,
      Ellie x

      Reply

  30. Adele Chambers
    Oct 19, 2011 @ 14:00:00

    Hi Ellie

    Just read your whole blog, found a link through Clare Balding on twitter. What a journey. I had tears in my eyes through most of it! I love your approach to kicking the S**t out of cancer. Your positivity is inspirational to everyone not just those who are fighting disease! I hope with all my heart you have seen the last of the c word and continue inspiring people through your blog. Big hugs and love.

    Adele xx

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 19, 2011 @ 14:07:39

      Thank you Adele. I have a feeling it’s going to be a long journey but I’d rather that than a short one! I don’t think I’ll be scanned again until December so until then I can (kind of) get on with my life! Thanks for reading and taking the time out to comment, Ellie x

      Reply

  31. Amanda
    Oct 19, 2011 @ 14:16:19

    Hi Ellie

    I was directed to your blog via Clare on twitter and have just read it all in one go (I should be doing some work but hey, what’s more important!) What an amazing spirit you have – you are right, find the silver lining and life is more bearable. I did when I had bc (6 years clear now), and now I would not have not had it (if you see what I mean – sorry – appalling grammar!) because there is so much kindness and warmth out there if only your eyes are open to it. Sounds a bit soppy, but people are amazing – so are you! Keep on fighting – we’re all with you every step of the way.

    Love
    Amanda x

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 19, 2011 @ 15:13:39

      Hi Amanda,
      It doesn’t sound soppy at all but I know what you mean. People are amazing and I’m glad of the occasions we can all remind ourselves that. I’m pleased you are six years on from breast cancer, although you never really leave it behind I’m glad that you are healthy right now – long may that continue and thank you for reading, Ellie x

      Reply

  32. Marieke
    Oct 19, 2011 @ 14:29:14

    Hi Ellie. I am glad to have found your blog. I have recently lost my wife to a brain tumour and I found keeping a blog throughout the entire 6 year process really helped me to make sense of things and my own emotions. Since Jane’s death, I keep a blog to put my feelings about being a widow in to words. It helps me immensely but it turns out a welcome side-effect is that people around me understand much better what I am going through and how they can help me.

    I can completely identify with what you say about being kinder because of cancer. When Jane was ill I was too busy caring for her but since her death, in the midst of my own devastation, I find myself much more caring about other people. I am much more likely to stop and ask how a stranger is doing when they look upset. Perhaps it is because when I am upset, I am screaming inside for someone, ANYONE to just ask me why I am crying at the meat isle in Tesco. All too often we don’t reach out because we fear others will be scared off by our sadness or pain. But unless we tell people we need help, people will never know.

    Cancer is a most evil disease. I hope that you will stay positive and that you can enjoy the nice things that are no doubt still on your path.

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 19, 2011 @ 15:10:44

      Hi,
      I’m so sorry to hear about your loss. When I think of Tom trying to pick up the pieces if I die it is truly unbearable. Thank you for taking the time to comment. Sending you all the goodness I can muster, Ellie x

      Reply

  33. Jo
    Oct 19, 2011 @ 15:17:50

    Ellie, what a moving blog you have written. I wish you all the best with your future treatments. Your family & Tom sound wonderful. It’s also so nice to hear that the money that I & thousands of others have raised through runs, marathons etc over the years actually do make a difference. Prof Hope, Maggies & the trials you mention are testament to this. I look forward to reading many more posts from you.
    With lots of love
    Jo
    xx

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 19, 2011 @ 15:50:29

      Hi Jo,
      Thank you for stopping by and thanks for doing the fundraising. I have a friend who has signed up to do the Brighton marathon in April for Cancer Research and he hadn’t ever been on a single run until a couple of months ago. Believe me it is worth it! I will be on the finishing line cheering him on. Ellie xx

      Reply

  34. Jean Williams
    Oct 19, 2011 @ 15:36:08

    I’ve just found your blog through a tweet by Clare Balding. What an amazing read I’ve just had which included the whole range from sobs to giggles. I feel very humble against your positivity and gigantic spirit. Thank you, you are an inspiration xxxxx

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 19, 2011 @ 16:06:58

      Hi Jean,
      I’ve had lots of people vist via Clare’s twitter so I’m very grateful to her for that! Thank you for stopping by the blog and for leaving such a lovely comment. Ellie x

      Reply

  35. Charlotte Jackson
    Oct 19, 2011 @ 20:13:48

    Dear Ellie, I too have found your blog via Clare B’s Tweet. Your’s is the first blog I’ve ever read (!) and I feel privileged to be allowed into your life, so private and so personal. I too am a cancer survivor having had a run-in with it in 1996 and I do sometimes feel that, rather like planes, we only hear about the ones that crash and not the thousands arriving safely every day. I got off lightly really and the worst part by far was telling my mother; it was a tragic little scenario I will never forget. Especially as she thought, at 40-something, I was going to tell her I was pregnant. Whoops! You have a fantastic attitude, you are intelligent, can ask the right questions and rationalise what is happening, all great advantages for a full recovery. I wish you very, very well Ellie.

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 20, 2011 @ 09:00:45

      Hi Charlotte,
      Thanks for the kind message. I hope your recovery continues and I’m not sure anyone gets off lightly with cancer, I’m sure you had your middle-of-the-night panics about the ifs and buts. Thank you for stopping by and reminding the readers that cancer isn’t a death sentence – something I hope to prove in years to come. Ellie x

      Reply

  36. Alice du preez
    Oct 19, 2011 @ 21:32:35

    Hi ellie, thank you for your article in grazia, and for sending out such a heartfelt and honest post this week. You are so right about people and kindness, I think it was always there but I only truly recognised people’s generosity after life knocked me and my family a blow, as life does. But your determination and strength is inspirational, I pray that you find that strength of spirit every day and that you continue to be touched by peoples generosity of love x

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 20, 2011 @ 09:03:22

      Thanks for reading the blog and leaving such a thoughtful message. I’ve been overwhelmed by the responses from people reading the blog and am so thankful for their kind words and best wishes – thank you for adding yours, Ellie x

      Reply

  37. Sally Newcomb
    Oct 19, 2011 @ 21:54:21

    Another one who found you via Clare Balding’s twitter. I am totally humbled by your inspirational words. You’re very brave and I admire your amazing positive attitude. Everyone should read your blog. Good luck and keep blogging! Sally x

    Reply

  38. Suze
    Oct 19, 2011 @ 23:12:59

    I found you on Twitter, I think, via my wonderful friend Lisa, who is another fantastic woman who is facing a diagosis of secondaries. Reading your blog has made me not only realise, and remember, how much kindness is in the world – but also made me feel that even when our friend is in unimaginable pain and fear, and when we fe totally helpless, that any kindness we can show may just help to ease things, just a bit.

    Wishing all good things to you,

    Suze xx

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 20, 2011 @ 09:09:07

      Hi Suze,
      I’ve been following Lisa’s story on her blog – I also read her book when I went through my primary diagnosis. I remember the weeks after my secondaries diagnosis and it was miserable so I can imagine what Lisa is going through but you do get through it and your world settles into a new reality that for the most part is totally doable. My friends have been like family to me over these last eighteen months and even to just receive a card or text saying that they love you means the world and can give you the kick up the bum to face the day. Thanks for stopping by Suze, Ellie x

      Reply

  39. Lara Moran
    Oct 24, 2011 @ 22:31:41

    Hi,I too have read the grazia article and am shell shocked at your story as well as that of kris from coppafeel. It’s hard to believe that such a headline disease is still so far off in some gp’s minds. My mum was diagnosed with breast cancer in June but hopefully it is all gone, it was smaller than a pea and she is about to start radiotherapy following the lump removal. Hers was found through a routine mammogram so the doctor is very positive and shes shown amazing positivity despite her mum having breast cancer at the same age. It’s been an eye opener experiencing this through someone so close, I am astounded at the positivity of those that have cancer, even more so at your young age. It certainly makes me realise that we have to look forward and like you say be kind. I will continue to read your blog and hope so much you prove those doctors wrong. Let’s hope your stories and others reach those doctors who can’t find time to listen and respect their patients concerns. Thank you for raising awareness on such a virilous disease, Lara x

    Reply

  40. Roz
    Oct 25, 2011 @ 17:36:23

    I was flicking through Grazia last night, just casually ogling bags I can’t afford whilst watching Alan Sugar make teenagers squirm in their too-big suits (bless). I hadn’t really been paying much attention to the magazine, but then bam. There is you. And something about you just made me stop.

    To be honest I didn’t even read the headline until after I’d thought ‘What a strikingly beautiful girl’. (I am very aware this makes me sound incredibly shallow, but let’s be honest – all girls look at other girls!). Then there was that headline, that made me jump immediately to your name… That’s Alex Dobson’s Ellie! (I went to uni with Dobbo – ledge!).

    I obviously know about your story through Al, and hearing her talk bout you and your continuing inspirational attitude towards your illness has given me goosebumps. I know we havent met, but as we are both lucky enough to have such an amazing friend in common, I kind of feel like I know you a bit and I just wanted to get in touch and say that I think you truly are an incredible girl. And you write really beautifully Ellie.

    I am lucky enough not to have had much experience of cancer, but even to me your words and your positive attitude to everything resonate. I just wanted to offer you some words of encouragement for you to keep doing what you’re doing, and to wish you good luck for your upcoming wedding. You two make quite the handsome couple!
    Al thinks the absolute world of you, and I can absolutely understand why.

    Take care hun, love Roz xx

    Reply

    • Ellie Jeffery
      Oct 26, 2011 @ 08:49:02

      Hi Roz,
      Thank you for your message. Alex and Pips have been amazing friends throughout all this. They have a habit of sending me huge beautiful bunches of flowers whenever I was going through a rough patch – which was pretty often when i was doing the ‘hardcore’ chemo! I am truly blessed with the amazing friends I have – as you must be too to have Al in your life.
      Thank you for reading the blog and leaving such a kind message, love, Ellie xx

      Reply

  41. Ashley
    Dec 16, 2011 @ 15:30:14

    Hi Ellie,

    After hearing all about the charity night at Akbars recently I’ve decided to spend my day off reading your blog & I am truly moved. I’m starting from your first blog & working my way up to date… I have absolutely everything crossed for you.

    Your amazing outlook on life, the positivity you possess and your obvious determination are inspiring and are making me appriciate everything we have, whilst we have it.

    This post especially has brought me to tears, your a wonderful writer.

    I’m sending you all of the positivity possible.

    Lots of Love xxxxxxxxxx

    Reply

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